July 8, 2013 by Stephanie

Fight For It

It’s a Monday after a holiday weekend. So like most, I sit here reflecting on the amazing down time that I had and dream that it wasn’t over. My newsfeed this morning was littered with all the witty “I hate Mondays” commentary.

So to recap our 4th of July.

It was not full of BBQ, beer, red/white/blue ribbons, or personal fireworks.

It was full of rain…all weekend long.

Don’t feel sad; we managed to make the most of it. We had a great relaxing weekend being free of work and responsibilities. And seriously what is better than actually being able to sleep in and be lazy on wet and rainy days?

Fort Campbell had a 4 day long carnival event, which we did attend on the 4th in the brief parting of the clouds before they canceled the firework show. It was really cool to see all the families tredge through the mud to celebrate what our families have gone through to ensure freedom for our nation.

We did not ride any rides because after working at an amusement park for 6 years (this is where Tom and I met btw), I am pretty skeptical of any ride that can be packaged into a trailer as a traveling show. And don’t get me started on my nightmares of Ferris wheels. Plus it cost money, and we were being cheap.

I also worked games for 2 years, so I cannot wait until we have kids so we can win them useless toys. After working 8 hour shifts for 2 summers, you learn a few tricks of the trade. We just don’t have a need for the game stuff now.

We were not too cheap however for my ICEE obsession. I L.O.V.E ICEES.

We love that we are lucky to be together to celebrate our independence! I think about all those families who cannot say the same. (Special shout out to our buddy Andrew Martin and his lovely family! We can’t wait to celebrate with you when you get home! And also to the Landis family, you all are in my thoughts and prayers regularly!)

The night of the fourth we ended up watching from our backyard some of our neighbors shoot off their own fireworks.

Grace did not seem to mind her first firework display.

And yes we made an outside bed for Grace to be comfortable watching the show.

They had rescheduled the fireworks for Friday. But it rained all evening so we didn’t really want to pack up to go across the base. So we watched in the rain from a parking lot right by our house in our Jeep. Nothing more American than being barefoot in a mud covered Jeep watching fireworks I guess.

All in all it was a good holiday for us, and we cannot forget the sacrifices that are made to grant the freedoms we hold so dear.

Talking with my husband about how the fireworks sounded like war and his FB statuses for the day gave me a lot to reflect on, and I hope they do for you too.

“Today and every day, ask yourself two questions. Who sacrificed their life so that I could have mine? What am I doing to make myself worthy of that sacrifice?”

“Remember that rights aren’t something you are entitled to. Rights are something we have to fight for. Nothing in this world is free.”

Nothing like a national holiday to make you think about your priorities eh?

It’s ironic (don’t you think) that those who give up so much of their own freedoms are the ones that are making sure you and I have ours?

Now on to our home improvement project of the week.

We created these shelves so that we could have some flexibility on changing the deco in our house without the hassle of measuring and putting in new holes in the wall. Since we live in on-base housing, we are trying to leave as little damage as possible.

Shelves are pretty expensive if you want to buy more than one of these at the store, and you cannot get them in a very long size. I think the cheapest we were able to find was like $30ish bucks for one that was like a foot long. So Tom volunteered to make them for us. For 8 shelves, it was around $75 for us doing it this way. (If you are able to find ones cheaper than this, share with the world please!)

Basically you pick the size shelf you want from the wood selection. We chose a couple different sizes because of the what we had planned to put on the shelf, so we had 1X2s and 1X3s.

Then we picked out simple decorative molding to make the face of the shelf. You can make it relatively inexpensive depending on the molding you pick, or just not getting molding and just using the base wood only.

Tom did all the handiwork. It seems pretty simple from watching him. He made all 8 of them in an afternoon.

This is before he stained them all.

Then he added wall hangers/hooks on the back to make them more secure on the wall.

Then was the long process of measuring out the locations on the wall. This included a stud finder, tape measure, level, T-square, and Tom’s persistence for perfection.

Here they are empty.

And here is our new photo wall. I am working on getting some new photos, and it will be so easy to add. I can just move them around until I feel like I have the layout I like. Until the next day when I want to move them around again.

And then this is our photography wall. We are really into collecting old camera gear and wanted a way to display it!

They turned out fabulous. They really make the room complete now! Pardon my crocheting mess in the corner…

I hope you all enjoyed your Monday as much as one can after a freedom celebration weekend!

July 1, 2013 by Stephanie

“My Job is Freedom”

Another dose of Talks with Tom.

With deployment, one misses out on a lot of TV programming. Seasons come and go. And in the past you would just miss out on them forever, or until the next year when the DVD was released. Then you had to spend a nice chunk of change on that. Oh, or Hulu may or may not have your show, but you can only watch the last 5 episodes and hope they don’t go to HuluPlus.

That is until recently.

My friend Susan introduced me to a site that allows you to watch ANY episode, from ANY season, at ANY time. As a TV junkie, this is a life changer. And when I say any, I will admit that I have not looked for every show out there, but it has yet to fail me.

I introduced Tom to “Project Free TV” so he could catch up on the Walking Dead and Gold Rush.

The trouble with the site though is that it can be finicky and not load as lickity-split as Hulu or a network site, or the unrealistic expectations we may have as millennials.

Tom was near the end of the season for Walking Dead when we had this conversation.

Tom: This shouldn’t be this difficult. (talking about uploading a video)(groaning and impatient foot-tapping commenced)

Me: Well, if it is that easy, why don’t you figure out how to post episode videos online on your own?

Tom: That’s this guy’s job. This is his only job in life, and he can’t do that? How hard is it to be awesome at your job? My job is freedom, and I am pretty awesome at that. I have that down pat. I’m just saying.

Happy Independence Day everyone! I hope that we can all celebrate our freedoms this week, and that videos will upload at your command.

And what can be more than American than a weekend was full of home improvements?

We inherited a pair of dressers from my grandparent’s over Father’s Day weekend.

This weekend we did a makeover on these bad boys.

Before…

They were this old plastic wood, so I first primed them with this stuff.

Then I painted on a light orangey brown satin finish paint. I did two coats of this. Tom had to help with some parts because I am not the “smoothest” or most patient painter. You can tell the edges that I worked on–>globs of dried paint are left in my wake. But I did paint 95% of them fairly successfully! It was just a lesson in my on-going curriculum of patience.

And after…

We ended up keeping the same knobs (just taking off the fancy plate things that were on there). It would have cost too much to replace around 25 knobs, but that is an option if you are trying to redo dressers to make a different look.

I wish I had taken a before and after of our bedroom/closet to show how dramatic of a change it was going from living into laundry basket chaos to a much more organized and structured closet. We can actually see everything now in it’s place.

They aren’t perfectly brand new. You can still see nicks and wear and tear from the years they spent in my grandparents’ home. But we gave the pieces a facelift and hopefully a new life with just an afternoon of time and a little bit of paint. And as Tom says, “They are just showing some character.” (He also said that about my globs. He’s a keeper.)

I am excited this week to see what is happening on base for the 4th of July. Red, white, and blue baby!

What are you doing for the 4th?

June 25, 2013 by Stephanie

More Than Ever

Recently Tom had surgery at the on-base hospital. He had to be knocked out and sliced open. Someone had to go with him to be his partner and follow the doctor’s instructions, get his medications, and other things that you do for someone who just got their stomach ripped apart.

That someone was me-his wife.

I have been titled an Army spouse. My ID says I am a dependent. I had to show my marriage license to get this badge of honor.

This ID then opens “gates” to get onto base, to get his meds, to sign different documents, etc. This little piece of plastic has guaranteed me a lot of things as his partner in life.

While Tom was on deployment I received his checks and benefits.

I am his power of attorney in case the worst were to happen.

It was a great solace for him and I when he was on deployment knowing that I was able to take care of things if needed. (Except for that whole credit card thing, and no I am still not over it..)

I was able to do that because some politicians have decided that I am “blessed” to be straight. I have the “right” to be married because I was born liking the opposite sex.

Seriously?

Why am I granted this freedom when some of my closest friends are not? We have the same diplomas, came from similar families, have brothers and sisters, have similar faith systems, and live in the same neighborhoods. We both love with our whole hearts and have decided to be with one person forever.

Why are service-members that my husband fights with not able to have the peace of mind knowing their husbands and wives will have benefits while they are away and can deal with the day to day without any extra red tape or people saying, “I don’t think so.”

Deployment was hard enough with the realities of war. I cannot even begin to imagine it without the support and safety-net of the spousal privileges. And the communication you receive from the FRG only goes to spouses. The FRG was my main connection to the Army and helped me understand what is going on and what to expect. This group gave me information that I needed to feel better about the deployment and feel like I had some people to reach out to if ever needed. They were my life line and sense of stability some days. In deployment times you need to know you have that security, because some days that is all you have. At some bases, same sex spouses are banned from these organizations. Banned from hearing first hand when their spouse is coming home and the best way you can support them.

To think that our children could be impacted negatively by our love instead of profoundly brought up by it because of someone holding your parents back because your parents happen to be the same sex.

Like Major Shannon McLaughlin and her wife, Casey McLaughlin

To think that I would not be able to live on base with my husband and share our lives together.

Like Marine Captain Matthew Phelps and his soon-to-be husband Ben Schock

These are just two of the thousands of love stories.

Love stories–We grew up adoring Love stories and rooting for happy endings. (Well at least I did.) So why is there so much hatred towards them now? Why isn’t the solution obvious? Love is love. Love is about hearts not parts.

I know I get to have the peace and ease of being married already with the “government” blessing and benefits. And it may not mean much for me to fight for something I already have for myself. I realize my massive following of 25 people on this blog may not go far. But as an human, I could not stand idly by. So instead of changing my profile picture, I write.

I am big supporter of marriage. If you have read any of my words before, you know that I think marriage is awesome. So I am a big proponent of marriage for anyone who decides to make that commitment to another person.

Marriage to me is much more than what a piece of paper says, but unfortunately the reality is there are some doors that open because of that paper.

My words may be small and not far reaching, but I hope that people take the time to listen to the real stories and struggles and think about their choices and behaviors when they decide to pass judgement. Get to know real stories so you can understand the impact of your own judgements. We all came in this world alike and will leave alike. We breathe the same air. Our hearts beat. Period the end.

Show a little humanity will you? Have we all forgotten the golden rule that we were taught in kindergarten? “Treat others as you wish to be treated.”

Gosh life was simple then. Play, count, have snack, play, learn ABCs, play, nap…

Someone wise once told me, “Be as human as you can be.”

I ask that everyone dig a little bit to figure out what that means to you. Ask yourself if how you feel/act is really being “human.” If your answer is always yes, good for you. You are a saint. If not, jump on the self-reflective train with the rest of us.

This week our country will change dramatically with the decisions that the Supreme Court will be sharing one way or the other, and hopefully sharing soon.

For this couple and so many others, I hope that the SC decides in love and what I believe to be equality.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?NR=1&v=sb2Pi5M4LEE&feature=endscreen

Bill and John have a breathtakingly beautiful love. During this video, I laughed, cried, nodded in agreement as they explained some of the day to day of marriage, and then I was heartbroken. Heartbroken that there are people who don’t see this as real emotion and real love. I mean seriously, those selfies they took are just delightful.

For goodness sake, it is just two people loving each other. Your feelings have nothing to do with their marriage.

Oh wait they do…says every law saying a marriage is between a man and a woman. Until when…

I am optimistic that others can see that Bill and John deserved what I have been granted.

I hope my words are crafty enough for you tonight. Thank you for bearing with my ramblings.

Love one another more than ever.

freedomtomarry.org/military

June 24, 2013 by Stephanie

Talks With Tom Begins

My husband and I have some of the oddest conversations that often leave me either laughing or just bewildered. Thought bubble-“Did we really just talk about that?”

And my next thought bubble was that you should experience that too. You’re welcome.

I got this idea from a fellow blogger who documents her conversations with her soldier as well. So thank you Amy for the idea! You can see her convos at ArmyAmy. It’s nice to know I am not alone.

So here is the first installation of “Talks with Tom.”

This conversation may get into more than you want to know about Tom and I, and our dog Grace.

Tom has taught our dog Grace to sit on the bathmat in front of the toilet when we are using the restroom.

Yes, you read that correctly.

I am not even kidding when I say this. Grace will be in the other room when I go to use the bathroom and as soon as she hears the toilet seat, she comes bounding in after me. She then will sit like a statue on the rug and watch me go pee or number 2. In all fairness, she faces the door and just looks at you periodically. She does grant you some decency, I guess. At first though it is very odd and weird to have a dog watch you while you do your business. It’s a good thing that I don’t have performance anxiety when it comes to bodily functions.

I mentioned this odd Grace behavior to Tom and he responded, “Oh yea, I taught her that.”

Me-“Why?”

Tom-“That’s when you are most vulnerable to an attack. She is my guard dog, so she is going to protect me while I doodee.”

Me-“Who is going to attack you in our bathroom?” (I should really know better than to ask questions.)

Tom-“My point exactly.”

Then he went on about some invader story in the end of the world and how Grace is instrumental in our security…This is my life.

After awhile, it has become oddly endearing that she sits there staring at the door and back at you waiting for our attacker. At least I will be all cleaned out when the robbers get me. Thanks Grace.

He is also apparently training her to be used to living in a tent. This gem happened when Tom stayed up all night with her.

Come back for the next Military Monday to hear our wacky conversations.

The craft today is all about organization!

This has been our counter since we moved in. Piles of who knows what.

And that is on a good day. This also doesn’t show the piles of stuff on the coffee table, dining room table, etc. So needless to say we were getting stressed about the clutter.

So I went to Walmart and bought 2 standing file trays, and picked out some scrapbook paper.

I cut out the paper to fit the front of the boxes. Then I sharpied our initials into each one. That way we each have a place for our mail/papers/whatnot. We can each decide our own “system” too, which sometimes in a marriage is important to have separate areas.

Then I just hung them on the wall at a height that we could reach in there.

I added the menu board I did a couple months ago to the mix. Although, it is no longer the menu board. We decided that planning out our week’s meals didn’t work for us. So we have made a deal to do 2 different recipes each week to be able to plan for the appropriate groceries, but we don’t pick which day we will cook them. We are spur of the moment type of eaters, so it didn’t work to plan 7 days at a time when we aren’t sure if we want a taco or spaghetti in 7 hours. So I changed out the food quote to “everyday” and we made it the chore/to do board. Much better!

I also printed out a picture from our wedding to even out the layout. It has made a huge difference in the kitchen! No more blank white walls!

Here it is in use!

All in all a very easy hour of crafting.

June 20, 2013 by Stephanie

American Wedding

Last week I was able to experience something that not many Americans in the modern day can say they have done.

I attended a real life BALL.

And by ball, I mean like fairytale ball. Like the one Cinderella went to and lost her slipper kind of ball. Well except this one the king and queen are not trying to marry off their son.

Was I really living out my Disney princess dream?

The best description I can give came after talking with my friend Kate about the experience. I give her credit for it; it is pretty much spot on.

“It was a like a wedding reception for America.”

And it so happened to fall on the Army’s birthday last Friday. Here’s to a great 238 years!

Tom just had surgery for an injury he sustained during his time away, so he wasn’t much for celebration that week. The things we do for love though. He was a trooper for me since I had never been to a military ball and endured the pain of dressing up in his formals. He just couldn’t stand up straight, move very fast, or laugh without holding his belly. I am a cruel wife, I know. Seriously though, it was our one guaranteed chance to go to a ball!

And he admitted the day after that he was glad that I made him go.

Living near Nashville has it’s perks. The 101st Airborne is able to have their balls at the Gaylord Opryland in Nashville. Talk about once in a lifetime!

It was magical. I am not sure I was even able to soak it all in. There was just so much! It was so surreal and breathtaking.

This particular event was to celebrate the 3rd Brigade coming home from their most recent deployment. There were around 1,000 people at this event. It was to celebrate the success they had and to decompress from being at war.

Because of the timing though, it signified a little more for me.

It really was like a wedding reception. I have been living a pretty distant life away from the Army since Tom enlisted. I could separate myself when I wanted to and be something else besides a military spouse. But now that I have moved here, I have a VERY different relationship with the Army.

I feel it every day in a very different way, much like how it is for a relationship when you get married. It becomes a little more serious. The Army is much more present in my day to day. And not in a “in your face-I’m stalking you” kind of way, but in a “hey, you’re the cheese to my macaroni” kind of way. From seeing the camo everywhere in our home, driving on and off base, seeing “America” basically on every corner, to serving military students much more openly at work… And did you know that most stores give military discounts? Every business asks for our IDs so we can get discounts, and when I ask if that is an every store policy or just this area, most say that it is every store. Hidden secret! I am going to have to hop on that!

So this ball for me was a little celebration saying I am ready to commit to this thing and there is no going back! Let’s do this Army.

It was a very special night with lots of emotions. We heard very high ranking officers talk to the men about the journey the Rakkasans have taken, and that now they are part of that legacy. Hearing these officers speak of valor, courage, camaraderie, and the leadership was breathtaking. I was overwhelmed throughout the evening as they talked about the selflessness of our soldiers. And most of them will tell you that’s just their job and want nothing more as recognition. You saw all kinds of medals, ranks, and other decorations signifying pivotal moments in these soldiers lives. (It was like a game trying to point out different ribbons or awards that you could find on people.)

There were moments of silence for those who have fallen. It brings a tear to my eye thinking about the silence as we held up our glasses in honor of the set table for one on stage symbolizing those who did not return.

And there were toasts to celebrate the victories. A lot of hoots and hollars to see whose company could be the loudest.

Cough*Angel*Cough.

If this type of event doesn’t make you feel patriotic, probably nothing will.

It gave me a sense of unity that I had not felt before. I was now fully connected.

Hats of to the Army. They know how to reel you in without you even noticing.

(And I didn’t even have to drink from the Grog to fill this giddy.)

It was a night filled with formal gowns and bow ties, nervousness, laughter, speeches, good food, expensive drinks, dancing, introductions, but most of all great pride.

Great pride for our nation, great pride for our freedoms, great pride for the 101st, and great pride for Tom. The service they provide to a nation of people they have never met and to individuals around them is something that cannot be described easily. Uplifting and encouraging for humanity. I felt a piece of it that night.

So here’s to our wedding America! I am glad Tom and I said yes.

My craft tonight actually was for a wedding. Sometimes I really surprise myself with how I match the craft to the entry.

I made this for two friends of mine who recently got married. Congrats to the Baumgardners!

I am not sure what this crochet stitch is, I started too long ago to remember the name. I am not sure I would do it again. It was really finicky, and I would get the needle stuck in the bubbles if I tried doing it without watching. And you had to count a lot. It was too much thinking. Crochet is a mindless thing for me. I don’t want to have to work at it.

It turned out nice though! I do like the textured stitches! I apparently forgot to get a close up of the stitch whoops.

I do love these colors.