July 1, 2013 by Stephanie

“My Job is Freedom”

Another dose of Talks with Tom.

With deployment, one misses out on a lot of TV programming. Seasons come and go. And in the past you would just miss out on them forever, or until the next year when the DVD was released. Then you had to spend a nice chunk of change on that. Oh, or Hulu may or may not have your show, but you can only watch the last 5 episodes and hope they don’t go to HuluPlus.

That is until recently.

My friend Susan introduced me to a site that allows you to watch ANY episode, from ANY season, at ANY time. As a TV junkie, this is a life changer. And when I say any, I will admit that I have not looked for every show out there, but it has yet to fail me.

I introduced Tom to “Project Free TV” so he could catch up on the Walking Dead and Gold Rush.

The trouble with the site though is that it can be finicky and not load as lickity-split as Hulu or a network site, or the unrealistic expectations we may have as millennials.

Tom was near the end of the season for Walking Dead when we had this conversation.

Tom: This shouldn’t be this difficult. (talking about uploading a video)(groaning and impatient foot-tapping commenced)

Me: Well, if it is that easy, why don’t you figure out how to post episode videos online on your own?

Tom: That’s this guy’s job. This is his only job in life, and he can’t do that? How hard is it to be awesome at your job? My job is freedom, and I am pretty awesome at that. I have that down pat. I’m just saying.

Happy Independence Day everyone! I hope that we can all celebrate our freedoms this week, and that videos will upload at your command.

And what can be more than American than a weekend was full of home improvements?

We inherited a pair of dressers from my grandparent’s over Father’s Day weekend.

This weekend we did a makeover on these bad boys.

Before…

They were this old plastic wood, so I first primed them with this stuff.

Then I painted on a light orangey brown satin finish paint. I did two coats of this. Tom had to help with some parts because I am not the “smoothest” or most patient painter. You can tell the edges that I worked on–>globs of dried paint are left in my wake. But I did paint 95% of them fairly successfully! It was just a lesson in my on-going curriculum of patience.

And after…

We ended up keeping the same knobs (just taking off the fancy plate things that were on there). It would have cost too much to replace around 25 knobs, but that is an option if you are trying to redo dressers to make a different look.

I wish I had taken a before and after of our bedroom/closet to show how dramatic of a change it was going from living into laundry basket chaos to a much more organized and structured closet. We can actually see everything now in it’s place.

They aren’t perfectly brand new. You can still see nicks and wear and tear from the years they spent in my grandparents’ home. But we gave the pieces a facelift and hopefully a new life with just an afternoon of time and a little bit of paint. And as Tom says, “They are just showing some character.” (He also said that about my globs. He’s a keeper.)

I am excited this week to see what is happening on base for the 4th of July. Red, white, and blue baby!

What are you doing for the 4th?

June 10, 2013 by Stephanie

Moving in with a Caveman

“What are you doing?”

This phrase has exited my mouth several 100 times in the last few weeks. When moving in with someone, there are some growing pains. Lots of growing pains. There are a lot of things you don’t know about someone until you share a roof with them. Albeit, we have lived together before, but when you do it so sporadically, there are still things to uncover or re-uncover. It’s like we are newly-weds all over again.

It is like that episode of Boy Meets World where Cory and Topanga spend the night together for the first time. Girl in face mask and guy clipping toe nails-classic.

Now add that the person you are moving in with is an infantryman.

My husband lived in the wilderness for 6 months, then lived in a practically empty house for almost 2 months.

This is what happens when you leave an infantryman unsupervised…

I do not claim his poor beer choices…

So on top of dealing with clothes/towels on the floor and dishes everywhere, I have to deal with Tom licking his plates after every meal and playing with knifes like he is a ninja.

And every reason resorts back to “I’m an infantryman.” (which inevitably leads to my eye roll)

Let’s just say, it has been interesting trying to get to know each other’s little quirks again. I would be lying if I said that the past month has been all rainbows and sunshines. We may have been together for the last 6 years, but there are still issues that we have to deal with. And honestly, I would be a little afraid if we didn’t have a disagreement here and there.

I may call Tom out with his primitive living, but I will admit that I have not been a perfect angel either. I am pretty set on my routines and everything having a place. As an introvert, I need my “me” time to get away from everything, so having someone around all the time has not been the easiest for me. I have had to redefine what that means for me and grab those moments when I can. Just this morning I got aggravated with him because he messed up my set aside “alone” time while I got ready for work. Really he was just trying to chat, and I was being rude and upset that I couldn’t be alone. This explains what transition I have had to go through as an introvert: http://thoughtcatalog.com/2013/how-to-love-an-introvert/ And I have had struggles with everything that this post mentioned, which in turn makes me drink the haterade towards Tom.

As every couple before us, we have had some rough patches learning how to read each other and effectively communicate. And we both have been so used to being on our own, so we have had to work on sharing a space and not feeling invaded by the other. Compromise has been the motto of our house or we just claim do-overs and start the conversation over. Although, I am not sure I will ever lovingly look over at Tom as he leaves army/survival gadgets everywhere (and I mean they are EVERYwhere). Just as he may not look at me with adoring eyes when I have filled the DVR with all of my TV shows once they start up again in the fall-the line up does get a little ridiculous.

But this is part of growing together. We will probably spend the rest of our lives trying to “tame” each other. I hope that every day we are able to learn more about each other. And who knows what habits of each other’s we may pick up on…only time will tell!

There have been a lot of good things too in this taming process:

Decorating the house
Making/fixing furniture-I couldn’t do this without Tom
Tom finally caving in and wanting to watch “The Bachelorette” with me
Grocery shopping together
Tom teaching me how to climb a rope (Yes like the rope you climb in Gym class. I have never been able to get off the ground, and these ropes are everywhere on base for me to practice on. And we’ve stopped on our way to the Commissary to practice.)
Eating dinner together every night
Deciding that we are becoming Red and Kitty from “That 70’s Show”
Playing outside with the dog
BBQ on the patio
Singing rap and pop songs in formal A Cappella voices (Sir Mix-A-Lot’s “I Like Big Butts” is my favorite.)

So for those of you who are about to move in with someone (significant other or not), understand that there WILL be an adjustment period. But there are a lot of laughs that can come with it if you can move past the unruliness.

***Anyone have any good stories to share after moving in with someone?***

Also with moving in to a new space there are a lot of new expenses. Since we had lived on campus, we did not have very much because most of it was provided. Luckily my parents are downsizing right now, so we inherited a kitchen table and set of chairs. You can see that they look like they were from the 80s or early 90s (the chairs, not my parents.)

We had to strip these chairs first. This meant taking off the couple decade old cloth and cushions that were starting to disintegrate. Then I had to pull out all the staples to make it easier for the new layer to be attached. Nasty job, but so worth it!

After we did that, Tom put on the padding and cloth that we had gotten from Hobby Lobby.

Grace was making it difficult for Tom to do anything because she wanted the padding to be her new bed.

We had planned to do this part together, but we weren’t able to get it all done in one night like we had planned. The stripping took a lot longer than we thought. But, Tom surprised me one night when I came home from work and had them all completely covered. Love him!

Basically a new chair!

Now we just need to update the table to match.

Soon we will be ready to entertain!

June 5, 2013 by Stephanie

The Vacation Doesn’t End

Time has definitely settled and slowed down a bit. I started my new job a week ago, so it is safe to say now Tom and I are living a regular life and are starting to create some routines. I tell ya, getting up at 5 is not fun, but having someone keeping you accountable to that makes it a little easier.

The house is still silly in some areas with having to go home for the Baumgardner wedding last week, starting a new job, just building some furniture and then debating what needs to be done before Tom has surgery this week. Let’s just say our spare bedroom is becoming that closet that you are afraid to open because of what may fall out.

At the end of the day though, I get to come home to my family.

But, there is still this inkling that there is a joke coming up and this honeymoon period is about to end. Haha Whiteners-fun time is over. After living in a long distance relationship for the better part of 6 years, it is proving to be a hard habit to shake.

About once a day, Tom and I share comments of fleeting thoughts we had thinking we only had a weekend.

Do you want to stay up all night since you are supposed to head back to Iowa tomorrow…ohhhh wait!
We need to get one last family walk in before you drive!
Let’s just keep eating out because there isn’t any food and I don’t want to waste our time together cooking and cleaning the kitchen.
I don’t want to see anyone else but you this weekend. There isn’t anything in this city that demands our time. What, we don’t need to live holed up in our apartment all weekend?
I still have all my make-up and face wash products in a traveling case…
Why are you in the other room? Come sit next to me, every minute, every second…
Watch your TV on your own time! We need to get through “That 70s Show!”
and the list goes on…

Having jobs to go to every day is helping us settle in a little more, so hopefully we will feel more permanent the more time that passes. And we can explore the city a little bit too. I am really looking forward to the Farmer’s Market and Jazz on the Lawn!

Either way, I am loving being able to have a face to face conversation every day and not doing that dreaded drive away from the person you love. Seriously the worst part of a long distance relationship is the travel back after a glorious weekend together.

Sayonara depressing sappy love song drive mix! (Ok maybe I will still listen to that…)

Now I just need to tame the beast…

This past weekend Tom and I made most of our bedroom furniture. I will be honest, I did not do much. I stained the bed and was the assistant who held the wood when a clamp would not suffice. Tom was the mastermind behind these. But we still spent most of the weekend in our carport with saw dust flying everywhere.

We only have pictures of the bedside tables right now. We need to do some adjustments to the bed before I will post about it.

Tom did a fantastic job designing these tables. He did them from scratch, drawers and all. Super impressed! It is nice having a partner who can do some pretty wicked woodwork and spend all weekend manufacturing these things for you!

And we even managed to save the wood that went through the downpour we got caught in on the way home.

They look great in our bedroom!

And here is the final product! Once we have the bed set up fully, I will post what they look like in the room.

May 28, 2013 by Stephanie

U-Hauling It Across the Midwest

We are officially all moved to KY. It has been a rough couple of weeks, and the house is still a mess. The plus side is that I get to wake up next to my husband every day, and it’s not just a weekend visit.

Moving is never easy no matter what your circumstances may be. So I have some tips for future moves to help alleviate some stress.

1. Use moving as a time to get rid of things. I probably threw out or donated about 10 bags worth of things. You just need to make the decision as to whether it is worth the effort of moving or not. I had some criteria that I gave myself because I have been known to keep things for silly reasons. Rules could be when was the last time you used it timeline or can you purchase an updated version at your new location for cheap.

2. Wrap your hanging clothes in garbage bags while still on the hanger. This does take quite a few bags, but it makes the transportation of them much easier. It also saves you time taking them off hangers and then back on at the new place.

3. Use clothes, towels, bedding as packaging. You have to pack these items anyway, so why not use them to fill space and protect fragile items. You can stuff these items into smaller, odd-shaped spaces so then you don’t feel like you are wasting a box. Sustainability my friends by not using newspaper or bubble wrap.

4. Use rolling suitcases to pack DVDs and books. These items are always deceivingly heavy. This way you can pack tons into one space, and the wheels make it easier to move.

The next few are helpful if you don’t plan on getting everything unpacked in a day…

5. Designate a backpack/box with important or sensitive items/documents. Being with the army there was a potential of needing several things quickly, so we needed to make sure we always knew where they were. Making a box for this made it a lot easier when Tom asked me where random Army paperwork was.

6. Know what you need right away for kids or pets and put that in the front of the moving truck.

7. Pack an overnight bag for a few days. We took a little longer unpacking, and the clothes were some of the last things we did since they were in boxes all over the house that we had used for packaging. I didn’t feel so stressed knowing that I still had clean clothes for a few days.

8. Label your boxes. This was a huge time saver. We were able to take things off the truck straight to their designated space. Yay organization! It also helped if we did need to find something quickly because we knew exactly what was in each box.

9. Save up money for eating out. The first couple days you are not going to have things set up to cook or have the food to do so. And let’s be honest, you need some lazy moments after unpacking/moving all day.

We still have a little bit to do, but we are waiting on some furniture to do so. It is starting to feel like home, so hopefully I stop feeling like I am going to be heading back to Iowa any day now. And I see several craft projects in our future!

Another thing we had to do in order to prepare was fence in our backyard for Gracie.

This was all Tom, but I had to show his handy work. He did a great job with it! We were only able to do a chain link fence with the guidelines of our neighborhood.

The baby gate did not fit in the opening we had. Tom made the wooden posts to wedge the gate in. And it looks like it was meant to be like that. Thanks to Tom and our buddy Martin for making it so I don’t have to have Grace on the leash to go potty! It is so great to have a yard for her.

Here is her first encounter with the yard. We have tried catching her hot laps she does, but it never fails as soon as the camera comes out she is done. Anyway, she seems to enjoy the yard!

I hope everyone had an enjoyable Memorial Day weekend remembering those who have fallen before us!

Till next time.

November 3, 2012 by Stephanie

Say What?

Tonight my craft entry is dedicated to Tom’s craftiness. He wanted to share a past project we did. In all fairness though, my family provided the dresser, and that was really all my input. Well, that and picking out the tile. Tom did all the work and deserves all the credit!

My parents are getting ready to downsize, so they are getting rid of a lot of things, one being this old dresser. As you can see, it needed some major upgrades.

We wanted to make it into a kitchen island. I will never forget the argument that ensued before we started this project. Tom and I had the hardest time communicating with each other what we envisioned for this island. We both lost patience with each other and were too stubborn to actually hear what the other was saying. That was the longest drive from Jeff City to Ames. (It is really difficult to fight while you have a 5 hour drive ahead of you. You can’t really escape it.)

Needless to say, we still have issues from time to time communicating with each other. And only being able to talk in brief spurts does not help. Tom has gotten even shorter with his patience after being trained to give information as quickly as possible, and because I don’t get much time it only makes sense for me to want to explain everything from every which way and being extremely long-winded. It’s an awful combination. So naturally, we get into tiffs every now and then trying to understand each other. Fortunately, we are mature enough now to call each other out and know when we need to step back for a second. And most of the time, we realize that we are more frustrated with the situation than we are with each other. But you take it out on the people you love most, right? Even though we have spent a majority of our relationship apart, we still have to find that balance with communication, and it needs tweaking every now and then.

And trying to figure it out when the blasted phone hangs up on us every few minutes is lame. Although, to be honest, that may soften us up a bit and make us forget what we are arguing about or realize that it was pretty dumb to be arguing over the Sprint account password. We become more frustrated with the phones than with each other, and then we get all mushy with the “I’m sorry” goodness. Delightful.

Then there are the small things about instant communication that I miss. I miss being able to tell Tom anything whenever. You know when you do something really embarrassing, and you want to tell someone how ridiculous you were? Tom is that person I can tell, and he will laugh at me, but he wouldn’t think anything less of me. (He does continue to razz me about things though.) Like talking about having a dog wedding or how I recently have forgotten to zip up my pants on many occasions. (FYI, I would appreciate you all not staring at my crotch. I already feel like a little kid forgetting so many times.) Today we had a conversation about bodily functions that 5 years ago would have disgusted Tom to pieces. Now, it is just what it is. When I talk to Tom, it’s like I open my mouth and all my insides just spill out. It’s just nice to have someone to just be completely open with without holding back because of embarrassment. Now Grace gets the brunt of my embarrassing moments, and she handles it pretty well. She never laughs at me, which I can’t say about my husband. Hmmmm, maybe I need to rethink this…

Besides sharing these things with my dog, I have resorted to still sending Tom texts with my ridiculousness. He is not able to see any texts right now, so it is going to be a real fun when he gets a few dozen of them by the time he comes home.

When you get right down to it with relationships, you have to learn to how to communicate. We have had to work really hard with this, especially with the changing dynamics of our relationship due to distance/circumstances. We are constantly trying to figure out each other and make the most of the situation. I think the fact that we are really open with each other helps us grow stronger together. We definitely don’t always agree, but we somehow manage to make it work. And part of that is understanding the art of compromise. Like this dresser for example. We both wanted it to look a certain way. At first we had a lot of trouble communicating what we wanted, but eventually we found ways to show our intentions and designs. From this, we had to compromise and meet in the middle with our ideas and blend them together.

I think the result is pretty awesome! Tom did a great job putting it together!

Now the dresser that my brother and I used as target practice, is a beautiful island that we use everyday.