October 27, 2013 by Stephanie

That Day My Husband Had Surgery

Last Friday, Tom had minor surgery to remove a fatty tumor from his hip. The thing was huge and disgusting to think it was inside his body. It was about as long as my hand and about a quarter width around. Gross. I will spare you the pictures Tom has.

Anyway, it was an outpatient surgery, so he was free to drive home afterwards. But you think most people try to take it easy when they just got cut open.

I came home that afternoon to Tom rebuilding his bumper…

When Tom gets a project in mind, he has a hard time not finishing it right then.

He welded on his own design of brackets, which saved us a little bit of money in trying to find a professional welder.

He got the winch from a buddy of his who is getting rid of their Jeep. Score saving another bit of cash instead of buying this brand new!

Off road dream car

So determined

not feeling the surgery at all

putting off dinner plans

living out his dream

my husband the mechanic

making sure everything is secure

You can imagine what I was thinking when I came home to this.

We are officially ready with our end of the world vehicle.

Gotta love it.

This is also my 100th post on the blog! Craziness!

October 25, 2013 by Stephanie

Friday Filter-More TV Premieres

Thought we were done? I told you I am obsessed. But don’t worry, we still find time to do other things.

I believe this is the last one for awhile. And looking back my shows are all over the place theme-wise…

Hart of Dixie

This show is a gem. I love it’s light-hearted stories and silly drama. It is about a NY doctor who was transplanted to a small town in the deep south. Some of the things that she experiences are things I went through when I moved to SC, so it is pretty funny to watch. Although until I moved to SC, this Missourian never really thought of myself as a Northerner. My dad turned me onto this show, sweet huh? He says that he sees a lot of me in Dr. Hart, which is probably true. Except, I could never pull off her heels on a daily basis. There is a continuing love triangle between her, George and Wade. I think she should be with Wade, but I see a lot of Tom in him, so it makes sense why I like him more. There is a lot of hilarity in the small town of Bluebell. Small town traditions at its finest. My favorites are the antics of the Belles, which is the women’s social society, which were shook up in the first couple episodes when Lemon and AnnaBelle up and quit. The disgrace! This guide says that my personality matches that of North Carolina, so it seems only natural that I would love a show about the South.

The Biggest Loser

This show is a feel good reality show. These are people looking for a second chance to become healthier and more active. I become a sap and feel really connected to the people on the show. To me, it is really inspiring. For the past few years, I have moved my schedule around to watch this as I train so I can watch this show as I run on the treadmill. For someone who was not a runner a few years ago, this show was really inspiring to do something about my own inactivity. It was like the trainers were ~~yelling at~~ pushing me through the screen, and it was a huge motivator to keep going with my running. It is only the second week, so there is not a lot of drama yet and they seem to be working well together. There are some seasons that I feel that the contestants are super selfish and overly dramatic in a bad way. I haven’t seen that yet this time around. I love seeing what creative ways the trainers get the contestants moving. It has really showed me how to be creative with my own workouts and the important thing is your life style. I do like that they focus on changing the lifestyle, and it is not just about dieting. They seem to do a lot about educating about healthy foods and exercising so these people can go back home and succeed without the trainers. It’s just a feel good show that I love to watch!

Pretty Little Liars

I started watching this show last Christmas when Tom was deployed. It was exactly what I needed as a distraction. It is ridiculous and awesome. I usually have no idea what is going on, and they keep me guessing every episode. Just when I think I know who A is, my hypothesis is proven wrong. They are making you believe that Ezra is A right now, but I just can’t believe it. I still think there is someone else controlling the game. And big shocker this week on the Halloween episode, Allie is really alive! WHAT? How does this happen? In all seriousness, how does she look that good and not disheveled after a couple years in hiding? This show is silly and totally not realistic, but that is why I love it. It will suck you in with the mystery and how things are overlapped. The intricacies of the details are numerous, and often times I have to play an episode over again so I can see an important piece of the puzzle. You have to come back each week because you have to figure out A! I think this was just a Halloween special instead of a premiere, so we’ll have to wait a bit for another episode.

Awkward.

I really liked the first season this show. It was perfectly awkward. The last season, I wasn’t so keen on. As like many MTV things, there is now a lot of focus on teen sex. It still has some pretty good moments, but I am not as invested as the first season. I will probably come back just for Tamara. I love her quick witty remarks, and spastic abbreviations for everything. The first episode made me really disappointed in Jenna. I thought she was better than what they have made her. So we’ll see how this affair goes. This is a good show that just gets your mind off of things. Its so random and awkward in its teenage angst. And who doesn’t love watching awkwardness when it’s not you in it? I think we can all relate.

The Walking Dead

Ahhhh! This show makes me have a heart attack or puke almost every episode, and yet I am addicted. I have only watched the first episode, so some of my question may be answered once I get through this week’s episode. In the first episode, they came back after 6 months from the huge chaos that the Governor let out. It was nice for them to ease back into the storyline to show how they have progressed over the last 6 months. (They never show how they get through the winter in this show.) There really wasn’t anything crazy until the last 15 minutes, which I am ok with because I watched it by myself this time…ahhh! This show scares the daylights out of me. I have had so many zombie and ambush nightmares in the last month. I really want them to stay in this life that they have made for themselves at the prison, but with the last 5 minutes I know this won’t happen. So is the zombie stuff like a real disease now-airborne or passing through food? I think there was something between Violet the pig and Patrick. That will mess things up fast. This show is pretty raw, and besides the zombie action, I appreciate the realness of the emotion. It really pays homage to the spectrum that we as humans can possess on the emotional/compassionate scale. It has sparked some interesting conversations. It is fascinating to see how morals evolve through the season, or stay the same for some. It brings up a great debate on whether character and what moral fiber will last at the end of the world as we know it. I love these debates, and I love this show, as long as I can fast forward through the scary parts or Tom tells me when it is a jumpy moment…

So that is all of them, I think. I hope you enjoyed it.

Send good thoughts our way today! Tom is having minor outpatient surgery today, so positive thoughts in our direction is welcomed.

Friday Filters offer a review that are my own opinions. I was not contacted by anyone associated with these works or compensated for my review. My review has not been influenced by anything other than my love for entertainment and art.

October 24, 2013 by Stephanie

A Letter To My Nieces

Dear Ava and Addison,

Both of you just had a birthday recently. Ava, you are a bright lively four year old. Addison, you are sweet and spirited at three years old.

As I watch you develop your own little personalities, I see that you have so many opportunities ahead of you. There is the excitement of going to school for the first time, slumber parties, your first crush, and figuring out how to drive through a fast food drive through for the first time. The possibilities ahead of you are vast and inspiring.

As your aunt, I want to pass along some words of wisdom for you girls. These are things that I look back and reflect upon and hope that you can become wiser much sooner and with less pain than I did.

So listen to your awesome auntie for a sec.

1. Fashion comes and goes. Do not let it rule or ruin your life. People go into debt and feel less than adequate all the time for pieces of cloth, and it really causes more anxiety than it is worth. Unfortunately as women, there is a lot of pressure to assert your sexiness with your clothing. Sometimes I am afraid of how the media portrays things, and how so many of us fall prey to believing we can’t measure up to the hype. Even my younger self shed a few embarrassing tears because I didn’t have the newest craze, and thought I would never fit in. Find a style that makes YOU feel comfortable. Clothes don’t define you, you define you. Be tasteful. And just be prepared that whatever you think is cool right now, you may regret years down the road. So no need to sweat it now.

2. Learn how to write effectively. With the way that technology rules our lives, so many people do not know how to write a full sentence with proper structure when the time arises. Understanding the difference between an adverb and an adjective and how to properly format a letter is important.

3. Take time to travel. Study abroad; go on road trips; just go places. This will help expand your scope and show you things you could never imagine. It is also a way to bring stories to life. Experiencing things in real life are so much better than TV/pictures. And if you only pick one place to go, your Uncle Tom and I would suggest Savannah, and also take us with you.

4. Don’t just emulate Disney princesses. There are many other women to have as role models. My personal faves are Sally Ride, Marie Curie, Audrey Hepburn, Eleanor Roosevelt, and your grandmas. I know this is a shocker seeing as I love most things Disney. While Disney princesses are beautiful and show how to be hopeful and can sing a glorious tune, they make it seem like you always need a Prince to save you from your worst nightmare. Be your own hero. Continue being strong for yourself.

5. Don’t get a credit card until your 20s. There is no reason for you to have one before then, and at this point hopefully you will understand how to effectively keep track of your money. Also the gimmick of they will give you a free t-shirt for your information is a hoax. This is you signing up for a card, and thus going down the road of a bad credit mark. And usually the shirts aren’t that cool. If you are that desperate for a shirt, it’s time for an aunt/niece date.

6. Learn how to drive a stick shift. Yes I know I am saying this one without learning this myself, but this is me teaching you through my mistake. I would suggest learning it while you are learning how to drive in the first place. Personally, I think it would be much easier that way. Plus if you are in a tight jam, it’s a handy skill to have.

7. It’s ok to change your dreams. Don’t let others dictate what you want to do with your life. These dreams will evolve over time, and you will figure it out. Just know that you need to be your own advocate for your dreams. The rest of us will fall in line when we see it makes you happy.

8. Know how to change a tire. Life skill that all people need to know, and it is relatively easy to do once you know where the jack goes. Also be ok with getting your hands dirty…

9. Don’t compare yourself to women in magazines. That’s not real life. I know there have been days that I have tried fitting into a size that I know is too small for me, and just ended up feeling miserable about my body. Comparing yourself to an image that is more than likely edited in some way is only going lessen your confidence in the beauty you already possess. Plus who wants to diet their entire life away? You don’t have time for that. (Plus your grandparents’ cooking is too good for that!) Beauty is being healthy and taking care of yourself, not the idea of trying to fit into a size double negative no waist/butt zero. Clearly this is an imaginary size that just leads you to think the worst of yourself since it is unattainable but yet glorified. Beauty is not measured by the number on the tag.

10. Watch Audrey Hepburn and Molly Ringwald movies. They are just too good not to watch. Seriously trust me. Sometimes ridiculous, yet iconic.

11. Make-up is not a necessity. As a tween, you may think you might die if you don’t have concealer or mascara, but I assure you, you won’t. Also less is more. Caking on make up takes away from your natural beauty. So unless you are on stage pretending to be another character for a part or you are cheering on your favorite sports team, there really isn’t a need for the make-up mask. Hopefully this is something you can learn faster than I did…

12. Be smart. Challenge your mind and spirit with learning new things every day. This doesn’t just mean getting straight As in school (although those do help to secure scholarships if college is what you are after.) This means being able to articulate your thoughts and not believe everything you hear without doing your own research. Be able to justify yourself and stand up for what you believe in. In the same light though, be able to objectively hear all sides of a story and be open to new possibilities. Soak in knowledge from everywhere and everyone. There is always something to learn.

13. Don’t depend on a love relationship to decide who you are as a person. You make you. They don’t make you. Naturally, you will meld hobbies and love some of the same things and they may encourage you to be a better person, but each of you should be your own person who makes your own decisions. Be true to yourself and be ok with who you are when you are alone. Ava and Addy, you are both fantastic, and don’t let the idea of love tell you otherwise. The love you find once you can do that is much happier, satisfying and real because you can be you at all times. And since this is a lesson that most of us have to stubbornly learn on our own, I am ready to wallow with you with Twizzlers and Sabrina (yes an Audrey film) when the time comes.

14. Get enough sleep. Naps are cool (in small increments)! Bedtimes are cool! I know it may seem crazy now, but there will come a time when you pray for more sleep. Being fully rested will help you enjoy the day more fully, instead of being half asleep or being in a caffeine induced coma all the time.

15. Read. Books, magazines, newspapers, whatever, just read. A well read woman is a dangerous thing, in a good way obviously. The act of reading inspires us to be imaginative, to think, to reflect, to connect, and so much more.

16. Play with a Skip It. Literally and figuratively. This is such a fun toy, so maybe Aunt Stephie and Nuncle Tom will have one at their house someday. I urge you to infuse fun activities in your life. Get outside, do things, be active. We are so stationary these days that it is important to “skip” the technology once in awhile to get our bodies in motion.

17. No job is beneath you. We all struggle with this at some point. However, if you are making an honest living and working hard, you will see the benefits. And if it is that bad, you will find a way out of it in due time. We all have our cleaning up puke or passing out hamburger stories (hopefully not together, but maybe) that taught us about hard work and earning your own way.

18. Show love. The world needs more of this, and both of you have such big hearts already. Don’t be afraid to love others who may not love you back. You never know how that love can impact the world.

I can’t wait to watch you both to grow into strong women who care deeply for those around you. I am excited to see what paths you take!

Believe in yourself. No matter what you hear or see from our culture, you are more than enough. So go and do great things because you are great. Only you can write your story, but don’t forget that you have many people around you who can be supporting roles and think the world of you. Just remember to be as human as possible.

You think it is tea party time now?

Love always,

Aunt Stephie

October 21, 2013 by Stephanie

Talks With Tom #10

Fun fact, I have no sense of smell. (Yes, I can taste.)

Tom has always been pretty free with passing gas. Without my sense of smell and being in the infantry, Tom has gotten even more comfortable crop dusting wherever. It doesn’t bother me, and most of the time I have no idea that he let one rip. Unless it is one of those loud ones or he starts dry heaving out of no where from whatever come out of his behind…

Tom forgets that other people can smell and that for the most part it is not social acceptable. He has gotten quite cocky about his flatulence in public.

This happened yesterday at the commissary.

I was waiting in line at the deli, and Tom had gone off to the sales aisle to see if there was anything worth getting.

Caveat-This knock knock joke is pretty common around our house. He had this conversation out loud to himself while he was off searching for sale goodies.

Tom-“Knock, knock.” (He had his head tilted back as if he was alerting the sky of his upcoming “joke”)

Tom answering himself-“Who’s there?”

Tom serving the punch line-actually passing gas

Then he realized he wasn’t alone in the aisle.

Grandma lady who was in the aisle the whole time giving him this scared glare thinking “What did this young man just do in my presence?”

Tom still out loud (nervously/surprised/trying to surpress the laughter)-“Cup of cheese!!!”

And here he scampered off back to the deli to tell me the tale.

Tom-“I just farted in someone’s face. It was probably a General’s wife or something.”

And then he proceeded to re-enact the story, and we made up a commentary about this woman’s thoughts. I am sure she was horrified.

I am still giggling ridiculously every time I think about it. I have to pause every few moments of writing this to get control of myself…

The funniest part to me, was how quickly Tom wanted to get out of that aisle. Usually, he doesn’t give any hoots about his toots, but this time was different. He didn’t even bring any of the candy on sale with him, and only was able to grab a couple items on his dash away from this woman’s glare. I am sure I will be laughing about this for years to come.

Also in case you were wondering, Tom swears that our house does not smell like farts, and no one has complained to our faces. So apparently We do a pretty good job with Febreeze and candles to clear the air.

I know you all are judging now–those stinky Whiteners. You wrinkle your nose if you want, but think about how awful it is to have no sense of smell and to always wonder if things are smelly! Another rant for another day is the obnoxiousness of enduring years of people putting perfume/candles/food under my nose to really test whether I can smell or not!

For the most part, I believe not smelling is mostly a blessing, especially being married to Tom and having two gaseous dogs. Match made in heaven. If I can learn not to worry about the unknown bad smells too much, you shouldn’t either.

And don’t act like you don’t fart.

Everything I researched today said that we do it on average of 14 times a day, but yet most of us try to hide it (that was totally the chair) or lie that we never would do it (whoever smelt it dealt it).

We worry too much about what other people think, myself included here. Babies and the elderly do it without ~~noticing~~ caring. And my husband is just making (air)waves to make this more acceptable for all those in between.

And let’s be honest, we all giggle just a little. Farts are funny. Try to watch this and not laugh.

(I have learned a lot of fart facts today, like that they actually make things called Fartypants.)

October 20, 2013 by Stephanie

Every Day Should be Race Day

This weekend I finished my fourth half marathon.

Before the Go Commando Half Marathon

This was a brutal race.

It started raining in the middle of mile one.

It did not stop until after mile twelve.

The rain fluctuated from sprinkling to blinding downpour. My clothes were soaked through by mile four.

There was a hill (or 2 or 3) in every single mile.

So I was soaked, cold (it was below 45 all morning), and my source of music was out since I was afraid of drowning my phone. I was feeling defeated every turn staring up at the road at another hill.

Here I was running with just my thoughts for 13 miles. Why did I do this to myself?

As you see on my shirt, I chose to run this race for T.J.

I was able to raise a $615 dollars for Parent Project Muscular Dystrophy. It wasn’t quite my goal, but still awesome to see the outpouring of love and support. I have left it open for anyone else who feels compelled to donate.

I didn’t run the whole thing. Many times, quite frankly I wanted to quit. Between the hills and rain, I was miserable. But then I remembered TJ, and a smile was put back on my face.

I started to really take in the race, more than I had for the last three (even Disney). Shocker I know.

Running for two and a half hours gives you a lot of time to be with yourself. It is a lot of time to criticize that I wasn’t going to PR, or focus on the cramp in my leg, or wonder if the liquid running down my face was rain/tears/snot.

But having TJ in the back of my mind made me run in a totally different way.

I had so much fun on this race despite being cold and sopping wet. I saw parts of Clarksville that are absolutely gorgeous in the fall. Since I wasn’t worried about time (well only to get into dry socks), I was able to observe things and be in the moment. We often try to rush to the end goal, so it was nice to take in the process. I was running somewhere between a walk and a hard pace. And I was quite content with that.

I think “every day should be race day.” And here is why.

1. People are constantly cheering for you. Who doesn’t love compliments like “You doing great.” “Work it girl.” “You are strong.” Some people even hold signs for you or come out in the road to give you a high five. Seriously, can these people come to my office all day?

2. Along the same lines, I have never felt that these races are competitive. Constantly you are cheering for your fellow runners on. I always end up running in the same group. You ebb and flow. Sometimes I was ahead of the rest, sometimes I was at the back. But the common theme was that we cheered each other on when we needed it most. We gave each other a heads up if the turn around was ahead. We made jokes to take away the fact our body was cramping. We ran along side each other to give the other person strength to take the next step. I think things in life would go much smoother if we took a lesson at this. Support each other even if it means you wont “win.” We are all living, so technically we are all winning. Comparison is the stealer of all joy. Run your race, and don’t be jealous of what others have.

3. Work hard and put in a solid effort, and you will be happy with your results. I am really proud of what I did today, and I worked for those 13.1 miles. No one can take that away from me.

4. No one criticizes what runners wear. Actually the more neon the better. I wear a fanny pack people. I would be ostracized if I wore a fanny pack to work or out and about. Think about it, these races are super accepting of all people.

5. Puddle jump. Oh hey rain. You tried making this race all about you? Well take that and puddle jump. Seriously enjoy life. (Why I realize that this doesn’t occur on most races, but I think there are ways to make every run fun…my interpretive dance walks are a big indication of this.) So take a moment to enjoy what you are doing in the here and now.

6. Do something to challenge yourself. This race was grueling with all the challenges, but the biggest challenge was the mental game. Being able to say you accomplished something challenging like this is a huge confidence boost. You also learn that you can do things if you just believe in yourself. We can do more than we realize.

7. There should be cookies at the end of everyday. Run for the cookies. Live for the cookies.