September 13, 2013 by Stephanie

Friday Filter- TV Review “The Office”

How do you even start reviewing one of the most popular shows in history?

I am going to go ahead and try reviewing the “The Office.”

This is my favorite Jim prank.

Tom and I just finished the final season this last weekend. We have diligently watched each season. We got behind the last two years because of Tom joining the Army. While he was at basic and deployment our favorite show went on the shelf until his return.

And now we have seen them all!

The Office ran from 2005 until 2013. It is based off the British version, just with an American twist.

It was a show about regional office of a paper company. The entire series was based on the fact that there was a documentary crew that followed the employees around. They just filmed real life.

It showed a 9-5 job and how relationships grow or don’t grow over time in the workspace. It displayed the quirkiness of real people and how they get through each day at jobs they don’t necessarily like. Except Dwight, he loves paper.

It is one of the few shows that cares about the fans, and they ended the show perfectly. You know how you watch season finales and there isn’t any clarity or they leave loose ends? Or you just hate that you spent all this time watching a show for an awful ending…ah hem Lost? Well The Office wrapped everything up nicely so there wasn’t any question where the story lines were going. It was a sweet ending to a marvelous show.

I will admit that I did not watch this show from it’s beginning. I came in several years later. I had seen bits and pieces, and thought it was dull and not my kind of humor. For years, I hated when Tom said, “That’s what she said.”

Tom and met in 2007 after the show had been on the air for a couple years. At that time, I was still against watching it and put my foot down in protest for a hot second. But, Tom is pretty persistent for those of you who haven’t met him. Plus you know when you first start dating someone, and you are willing to try new things that interest that person? Well that was me. He loved the show and eventually convinced me to watch from the beginning.

After the first season, I was hooked.

When you watch consecutively, you fall in love with the characters and are invested. You want to know when Jim and Pam will get together, which they drag you along for several seasons. You want to find out about Dwight and Angela’s secret love affair. You want to know if Dwight ever graduates from being the Assistant to the Regional Manager.

The show is super funny. I don’t know what I was thinking before…denial I guess. Let’s be honest, I was probably being too uptight about it. The good news is I obviously came around.

Jim’s pranks are my favorite. He doesn’t really work; he just tries to find ways to mess with Dwight. He was so creative! Tom’s favorites are the jello calculator and when Jim bought hundreds of feet of red wire and strung it around the office and surrounding areas.

This show meant a lot to us and our relationship. This show really helped us through our long distance while at Clemson and Iowa State. We would wait to watch it together when we were reunited for weekends. We would hole ourselves up and watch hours of it at a time, which is really the best way to watch any series. And each year before a new season would come out, we would re-watch the entire series.

It’s hard to explain the greatness that is The Office. They really did a wonderful job casting. I look at people they auditioned, and I just can’t picture anyone but those picked. Wonderful compilation of people.

The only season I wasn’t fond of was season 8, and mostly because we hated Nellie and Robert California. I think they could have done better. But maybe they were just setting us up for the end and to be pleasantly surprised.

I cried during the last three episodes. The last episode of the series Tom and I were both crying. I was bawling really.

I just felt so connected. When you are with a series this long, it’s like you live in this world. These characters become a part of your life, and they are your friends. I had to say goodbye forever to these characters. There is not an episode of this show that I haven’t seen. That was a hard pill to swallow to know that I wouldn’t see them anymore.

This is why I love T.V. I love feeling all these emotions and being connected to the story. (And in case you were worried, I know that I am really not friends with these people.)

This is our favorite show as a couple by far. It is one that we will watch again all the way through, maybe every year. Yep we love it that much. It’s like getting a hug from an old friend to watch this show; a friend that you like hugging, mind you. And that says a lot since I generally detest hugs…

If you haven’t given this show a chance, I promise watch from the beginning and give it a chance. I am so glad that I did!

Friday Filters offer a review that are my own opinions. I was not contacted by anyone associated with this work or compensated for my review. My review has not been influenced by anything other than my love for entertainment and art.

Come back on Sunday for “Autumn on My Mind.” Sunday’s episode is about fall food and sharing recipes. You can see the full schedule here.

Have a great weekend!

August 5, 2013 by Stephanie

Talks with Tom #6

This weekend was tax free weekend here, which apparently in TN is like another Black Friday event. They throw out tons and tons of sales around here to coincide with the tax free time. One of the gals at work went at 5:30am on Friday to hit up some stores for her little tykes to get some of the hottest new school items. I don’t remember this much hoopla in any other state I have lived in.

So Tom and I went to the mall yesterday to take advantage of some of the excitement. We had a great time shopping together.

After Tom selected his new pair of tennis shoes for work, he lingered near the shoelaces display rack.

Tom-“I have a dazzling new pair of shoes, should I get shoelaces to match?” His eyes were sparkling and lit up with glee.

Me-“Really?” (I have married a 5 year old. We might as well have gotten light up shoes.)

Tom-“Yea, I need to branch out from blues, greens, and all the earth tones.”

Me-“I think you will be ok with just the ones the shoes provide.” (which are yellow and black)

Amidst his rugged and sometimes obscene personality, he has his moments as a sweet and endearing hubster. We broke ways so I could go into Maurices while he went to Radio Shack. I like shopping in peace, so this works out in our favor. Moments after perusing some of the new skirts, Tom pops up and says, “You’ll find me at Mr. Bulky’s.” And I am fairly certain he skipped away to find his Jordan Almonds.

Resisting the urge to buy a few items, I left a few minutes after to follow him to see what kind of sugar coma he was about to go under. My heart melted when Tom pulled away from the cashier with an ICEE. He told me I could choose between mint chocolate truffle and the ICEE. The choice was obvious. ICEE all the way! The thought of the mint chocolate was sweet too, since I love most things with mint and chocolate. Love him.

Also, if you have never been to ROSS, you need to hurry up to your nearest store. It must be a southern store though, because I have never seen them back in the Midwest. It is a fantastic place to find some hidden deals for clothes and household items. We have been in desperate need of rugs, but weren’t willing to shell out the ridiculous amount of cash to do so. Our floors are bare no more! We bought two door mats, two long hallway ones, and one large one for our living room. We spent about $75 for all of these! And they aren’t just cheapo rugs either. Elsewhere you could have spent at least $25 for the small ones, and well over one hundred for the large one. Win for us!

Other highlights from the weekend:

Our family was in town. Five extra people in the house and another dog for Gracie to play with!
BBQing
finding the best local pizza place in town by accident (Luigi’s-the crust is delightful)
Farmer’s market, even though it was raining-I had the best soft pretzel!
My niece, Ava, teaching me how to play My Little Pony’s correctly and everything about the “Elements of Harmony”
introducing Ava to Mulan
watching the wedding episode of the Office-Love Jim and Pam!
people watching at the mall

I got out the fancy camera to practice some of my manual modes. Ava was a great subject! I still need to get a good editing program, so these are all before editing. Even though it was practice, I was able to get some fairly good shots of a few moments.

Grace loved having her cousin in town!

We went to the museum on base. Ava wanted to read to us.

We went to the park right next to our house for the first time.

Playing hide and go seek, she would whistle “youwhoo” if you didn’t find her fast enough or if she got impatient searching.

It was nice to have them visit and not have to do the driving. Someday we will live much closer so there isn’t as much time in between visits!

I have another curtain project for you today. Remember the torn bed sheet?

I decided to dress up this bathroom with it.

See how boring and WHITE it is? Again, we don’t want to paint or cover our walls with holes.

So I bought a cheap tension rod you find in the bathroom sections.

Very similar to the other curtains, I had to pin my edges down before I started sewing. This was a little different because I did need to sew all four edges, and the sheet wasn’t exactly straight so I had to work some magic to get it to look the way I wanted to.

Again, this is a great way to start sewing because it is just straight lines.

It has added a lot of depth to this small bathroom. And the nice thing will be that it will be easy to wash.

Sorry the quality of the phone pictures and the angles don’t really give the project justice, but trust me. It looks so much better than before.

Hope you all had a great weekend!

July 30, 2013 by Stephanie

The Friendzone

Working in Student Affairs you receive material about management and supervision styles all the time.

How to lead
how to motivate
how to create a team
how to create a team that you can lead with motivation
etc., etc., etc…

So naturally going into the women’s leadership series this morning, I was ready to hear how I as a woman could be a better manager.

For the most part I believe I am on the right track. Our speaker said some really great things that made me feel good about my personal views of the workforce and the plans I have for myself. She also shared a lot of the same work ethic philosophies that I had. In all, it was an energizing session to see a successful business woman as a role model, even if you only see her for an hour and a half session.

But I need to unpack some reactions that I am having to one particular statement.

She made a comment that it is very difficult to have friends in the workplace and be successful. This woman explained further that she did not mean she could not have sincere relationships with people at her job, but they just could not be her close friends and confidants.

Keep in mind that she is a “top dog” in her field.

I am 50/50 about this statement.

On the one hand I would agree with this, if the people at work are people that I supervise. These were some lessons I had to learn the hard way when I first became a supervisor. It is very difficult to be real friends with those that you supervise. You need to be able to draw that line for a myriad of reasons. I found that I could not keep them accountable as well if I was always concerned about whether they would like me. I needed to be able to remove myself from that social circle so I could be impartial in all arenas. It is ok to make unpopular decisions if it is the best for the end result, which can be tricky if you are always trying to become friends.

This is not to say that I did not care for those that I supervised. I truly did care about what was happening to them. I would cry with them, laugh with them, and defend them if needed. I wanted them to succeed, and would work to find environments/situations that would bring the best out of them. I was invested in their lives. But I knew when to challenge them and keep them accountable to their job, which was ultimately our relationship. This is just my opinion, but I think having a true friendship can cloud that work relationship. That doesn’t mean you can’t be friendly and show that you care. See how it gets tricky?

I remember telling Tom on many occasions that there were some of my students who would be my friends if we met in different circumstances, but the truth is I was there to make sure a job got done, not to find my new bestie. And this woman reminded me of the why. As a supervisor you need to show that you have the strength to hold things together and be the leader. It is hard to show weakness as a supervisor-I had to undergo the repercussions of doing so on a few occasions. You need to have friends outside of the workspace so you can let loose and be vulnerable so you are able to have that strong mentality while at work. I am not sure I would always be able to be on top of my game and be able to make some tough decisions if I was always worried that it would make our outing that weekend tense and awkward. Your friends are supposed to be people that you have no reservations around, and for me anyway I am not sure this is completely possible with the work responsibilities.

But this is just my own view of supervising students….

So I got to thinking about how this may look from a professional standpoint. Will it be the same as I continue on in my journey in Student Affairs?

To be honest, I am not completely sure this theory of no friends in the workplace can apply to all facets and all fields.

For example, when Tom and I talked about this at dinner, he said, “Yea, that’s not really an option where I work. You can’t big spoon little spoon in a sleeping bag with a business acquaintance.

So I can’t say that I completely buy into that you shouldn’t make friends at work. I don’t know if I would want to work that way the rest of my life. Then it just becomes about getting a paycheck and doing the time, which believe me is extremely boring and exhausting. I think about my profession and look at some of the people who I view as role models and I see them very successful but also having close friendships in our field. And some of my closest friends are those I met at work. I think that is why it has been so difficult to move from one job to the next. But in thinking about it, most of my close friends have been people who are at the same level as I am so there was never a supervision dynamic there.

Then I start thinking about my relationship with my supervisors. Some I respect and think the world of them, some have become mentors and my go to people in a work crisis (and often life crisis), some I don’t like but I respect enough to keep working for them, and some I just tolerate and do what they say to keep my head above water, and some I don’t respect and completely disregard what they say because of their lack of–well lots of things.

But was I ever really friends with them? And did that supposed friendship–or lack there of–impact how I felt about them as a supervisor? My mind is rolling…

I guess my two cents is I think you can have friends at work. I think you need to first look at what your work relationship is and whether or not you can see a personal friendship negatively impacting that role in anyway. Only you can define that for yourself because ultimately you have to live with the decisions you make. You have to think about the risk and rewards and see what you are willing to put on the line and at what cost. I personally don’t believe that I need to be friends with everyone that I work with. I want real authentic friends, and if I find that at work great, but if I don’t I am not going to force it. I will however be friendly and reach out to people that I work with to make sure we are doing what we can for the common good of our institution. But I think sometimes people do mistake this for a need for a true friendship. I will be kind and friendly to you, but we don’t have to hang out every weekend to have a positive work relationship or to create trust. That may rub people the wrong way, especially in a touchy feely profession like Student Affairs, but that’s my truth.

So maybe I do agree with this woman more like 70/30.

Although if you do have friends at work you may just have the newest hit on TV…