Today you turn FOUR.

The day you were born I knew that everything I expected about parenting was thrown out the window.

Experiencing the NICU with you, I was terrified. I felt like it was a mistake to be trusted to take care of you since I couldn’t keep you out of harms way as soon as you came out. You didn’t come with an instruction book. No matter how many books or articles that I read, I knew watching your sweet face fight to breathe on your own that I would fight to catch my own breath for years to come when I look at your face.

You are nothing like I imagined, but you are everything I need. It was no mistake that we were put together.

I still have no idea what I am doing most days, but we are on this ride together.

You make me laugh every single day with your stories. I love listening to your sweet voice. I wish I could just record all of our conversations. You see the world for its beauty and simplicity, and you remind me all the time to pause and to breath it all in. How you piece things together is astonishing to me.

You are so smart, and I am so proud of everything that you learned this year. You know your ABCs, and you can write most of your letters. You know how to spell your name, and you can count to 20. You love doing crafts and infusing your own imagination into it all. You sing the sweetest songs, and I hope I never forget how you sound right now. You know things like what a counter weight is and why it is necessary. You use words like humongous and adorable and a whole host of adverbs that I feel are above a 4 year olds vocabulary.

You had new experiences this year like Vacation Bible School and Gymnastics which both made it clear you have no concept of how to stand in lines.

You are so passionate, and you love so hard. Georgie, I hope you never lose that sense of wonder towards those around you. I wish I had your confidence and commitment.

Energy just pours out of you, and while it can be frustrating trying to reign that in at times, it is also one of the things I love most about you. When you put your mind to something, you go all in. I also love how much you release your emotions through your facial expressions. Your face tells me everything I need to know about how you are feeling inside. I hope that you never lose that sense of sharing your feelings with me or the world.

And I forever want to remember this time where you hardly go anywhere without your purple shoes (crocs), and that you put your pants on backwards because the drawstrings give you a tail.

Ever since you were born, God has been teaching me to let go of you and trust in the plans He has for you. You have been my greatest teacher. As I said last year, I continue to pray that I can gracefully let you go and let you grow, even though it may leave me breathless.

Georgie, you bring so much life to our days. My favorite moment of every day is waking you up and seeing the smile on your face as you embrace the day.

You are my bestest boy. I can’t wait to see how you continue to grow and see how you knock the wind out of me this year.