Fit For Me

It’s almost a new year, and with that comes all the hype about working out and getting fit.

This is the first year that I am going to jump in on that New Year’s resolution hype.

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I have always been thin and seemingly in shape. But the thing about being thin is that everyone assumes that you are in shape and fit.

Y’all, I can’t even go up stairs without breathing heavy at the end. I want to crawl on the floor in the fetal position sometimes the burn is so overwhelming. Drag me to my next location please.

I have lived a fairly active lifestyle. I played basketball from elementary school up to high school. I ran track for most of high school. Then I played intramurals in college. Once I had my first professional job, I signed up for a gym membership and that is when my relationship with racing began.

Then I got pregnant. My habits of running and doing general exercise went out the window because of all the bedrest notices I received. I still can’t believe that I walked a half marathon 19 weeks pregnant due to all the issues I had from the morning sickness, hormone therapy, and blood pressure/pre-eclampsia.

All that aside, I feel really fortunate that after giving birth it was not even days after that I was back at my pre-pregnancy weight. I know I am lucky in that, but that doesn’t mean that things haven’t shifted. I still have a cuople pairs of pants that refuse to get back on these new hips.

To be honest after a year of not really working out much, I just don’t feel good. I feel like mush and sluggish most days. I don’t feel like I know my own body. There are parts that I don’t even recognize as my own.This has caused a whole host of issues that I won’t begin to delve into here. Just know I have been on the struggle bus.

For the past year, I have felt that my body belonged to someone else. I was George’s incubator for 9ish months, and now I am his food bank.I have really been feeling that my body is no longer mine.

Yes it has done great things, and I can acknowledge that. I mean I pushed a human out after growing said human, and now I am feeding that human with this body. However, I want it to be mine again too. I want to feel good about myself and not feel like I am at the mercy of George. Although I will do anything for that kid, and I feel absolutely blessed that I am his mom and could carry him. However, I don’t want to forget about my health just because I am a mom.

It is just time that I start focusing on my body for me. I know I feel better (mood and energy wise) when I work out. I want that me time again, and I just haven’t been able to put the time in as much as I had in the past consistently with everything that has gone on in the last 4 months. It seemed like I would have a few good days where I could get a workout in then something would change, and I had to rethink my approach. Such is life right?

Now is as good a time as ever to refocus and make this a priority.

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So here is my goal. I am going to do a workout journal for the first time ever. (Ok maybe not the first, but every other dozen times I have done it, the entries stop happening after 1 or 2 workouts.) I want to document for the next year (yes the next 52 weeks) how I am doing with my goals. I am hoping by sharing with you here on the blog, I can be more accountable to those goals and keep a checklist (because I know myself and a checklist is the key to my success) of what I need to do. I thought about whether to recap once a week or a month, but a month gives me time to stray from the commitment. I need a more structured approach, and a week keeps me thinking short term. I don’t have a weight or a measurement in mind of where I want to be in a year. I am just hoping to see improvements in my stamina and flexibility. (However, I would be lying if I didn’t admit that I didn’t want to fit into those pairs of pants.) My goals are going to be in small weekly or month increments. S.M.A.R.T. goals people. In reality though, I just want to be fit.

I want to be fit for me.

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So I am jumping in big with a commitment to log weekly about my workout adventures.

While I am doing this to focus on my own fitness and be accountable to my personal goals, I hope that this opens up a community of support for finding your own definition of fit too. We could all use the encouragement!

My goal for this next week is to work out at least 3 times.

What does fit mean to you? Do you have workout goals for 2015?